To wax or not to wax? I was recently on a date with a guy and before even undressing the subject of “hair down there” came up. He said he can’t stand a woman who doesn’t wax everything. I’m not sure what I think about this. What’s Smitten’s stance?

by Simone Kornfeld


Ah yes, we have encountered such attitudes in our flirtatious escapades as well. And frankly, we find these bald declarations of pubic hair preference to be a bit of a turn-off. Of course we all have predilections for different genital shapes and styles. But this particular phobia often emerges from a man who has raised himself on porn, or has some developmental issues that have made a grown-up woman’s bush a scary place that must be tamed, or has experienced some kind of trauma (such as a sweet dude we once met who got his gum caught down there and has never quite recovered). SO, if you like to get waxed, if it is an exhilarating self-care ritual that makes your puss feel more plush, awesome. Do it! But if you prefer to maintain your swath of “electric fuzz” (in the words of e.e. cummings), that’s equally awesome. As in Smitten’s chapter The Look, we advocate creatively celebrating your body through the way you groom and dress. But the bigger point is this: only choose to remove your panties for the guy that’s going to relish the privilege of being in close proximity to your petunia. And if you wanna wax, wax for yourself, not because he’s afraid of the jungle.